An Abusive Relationship (With My Car)

I don't want to make light of the horrible situation millions of women are in with abusive relationships so if you are someone who is going to take offense... stop reading.

I am in an abusive relationship with my car. That's right. I love my (used) car but it abuses me. I give it gas before the tank is under a quarter full. I wash it regularly in the winter so the salt doesn't eat away at the paint. I always keep the inside clean and even vacuum once in a while. I bought these cute seat covers and rags to clean the dashboard. And what does it do to me... the motor on the windshield wiper burned out when it froze to the window during a long trip and I had no where to pull over (safely) to unstick it. The back passenger window stopped working for nearly a year (yet started working again just last week). The check engine light goes on everytime it drops below freezing. And now... the tailpipe fell off. That's right... fell off. I was minding my own business and I heard a rattle. Made a right hand turn and the rattle got worse. Decided to pull over and check out the situation at the next available parking lot. That was just not soon enough for my car. Oh no. It dropped pipe right in the middle of the road. Aaaargh.

I've only had this vehical for a year and a half but have already had to take it in for a check engine light (cracked gas tank cap, replaced it, light came on a week later), ran over a tack in the road and had to get the tire patched, and now have to get a new pipe. By the time I got back to where it had fallen off - someone had already picked it up! Grrrr. I'm afraid of what else they might find when they fix this little issue. And I know I am overdue for some new brakes (thanks to some serious heavy-duty chicago road rage driving habits).

Actually, on some reflection here, I see that the abuse is double-sided. I think that is only fair... if my Kia Sportage is going to drive my wallet into the ground, then I am going to drive it into the ground. VAROOOOOOM!!!!